Here it is, December, the year is nearly at an end. Soon, a new one will begin, just as it always has in the past, and will continue to do so in the future. This coming year holds so many unknowns, yet the one that sticks out in my mind is my son, who is a senior in high school, and his graduation. What happens next? It is both exciting and scary to see him approaching this crossroad in life. We, as parents, can only hope we have given him enough training and nurturing to be a upstanding member of society. We can only hope he can achieve what we couldn’t. What parent doesn’t want that for his child?
I look back on this young man’s life, of all the things we have experienced together and all of the things I wanted to experience with him but either didn’t have the time or the resources to accomplish it. I know he would say that he was happy growing up, that he did not feel he didn’t have the things he wanted or needed. Still, I can never shake the feeling that I could have done more, that my job as a parent isn’t over yet, that perhaps, I am not ready to let go, just yet. We always say we will have time to get the things we want to do in life done, and I hope I am right.
As we move through the next few months, finding out if he has been accepted to colleges he applied to, turning 18, possibly going away to college and being away from his home for the first time in his life after graduation, we will walk that path he chooses at this crossroad together. Maybe not always side by side, maybe letting him walk a little ahead of us, but always together. He will always be my little boy…just taller than me…and with more hair.
It’s December…where one chapter ends and another begins.